Take the Elevator
This podcast is purely about elevating people through individual life stories and experiences in the Elevator. In the Elevator, what's key is maybe changing your perspective; having self-actualization; embracing your purpose; and acting on it as we grow from one another. There is a whole different point of view when you look up to elevate.
Take the Elevator
383rd Floor: Early Childhood Done Right with Tamara & Danya
What if the “difficult” child isn’t difficult at all—but unseen, unheard, or simply in need of glasses? We sit down with Tamara and Dania of TD Training and Growth Unboxed to unpack how playful teaching, trauma-aware practice, and better language can transform early learning into a place where every child belongs. They don’t just work with kids; they teach the teachers and lift up the parents, creating a circle of support that starts with relationship and grows into real results.
Tamara and Dania lay out a practical triage mindset for classrooms—offer connection first, then assess needs, and bring in targeted services without shame.
If you’re a parent, you’ll feel seen—and equipped. If you’re a teacher, you’ll get usable strategies to include, not exclude, even on hard days. And if you’re a leader, you’ll learn how thoughtful words, playful PD, and strong family partnerships change outcomes.
Listen to feel hopeful about early childhood education again, and to pick up simple steps that make a big difference at home and at school. If this conversation resonates, you can subscribe, share it with a fellow educator or parent, and leave a review to help more people find the show.
Look up, and let's elevate!
Every day. Elevate. Every day. Elevate. Every day.
SPEAKER_01:Hey, it's Jen the Builder. And the Corey. And we are on Take the Elevator for another exciting episode. Promise you that.
SPEAKER_04:Indeed. And we are going to have a blast today. I guarantee it because. Well, let's go back, James. Because I'm just excited overall, first and foremost. Something really exciting happened this past week. And um I just really would love to highlight that. Jim, what did you do Friday night?
SPEAKER_01:I totally forgot about that. So Friday night, uh, we are invited to speak. Um I'm so excited, I can't even think of the name of the group. We were in Victorville. Thank you. A greater hope in Victorville. And it was over Zoom, and there was about 150 people that showed up for an hour. We got to speak about Gen Co, highlighting who we are as children's book authors. And it just opened up to so many different topics. Like everyone just kept wanting to ask questions. They got curious about our marriage, our challenges. How did we meet? Um, what skills do they need? Like it just went all over and it was beautiful. And I was just, this is I was like, this is what I want to do for the rest of my life.
SPEAKER_04:Absolutely. And so, with that being said, we were guests for uh that particular situation. And today we have some guests of our own. And I'm excited about these two guests because we met them at the children's networking conference. And what a joy to meet two people who are so passionate about what they do and understand what they're doing. You know, we have a lot of people today doing jobs that they have no clue what they're doing. But these two people, I can honestly say, know exactly what they're doing.
SPEAKER_01:You know what that reminds me. I know you're gonna introduce them. When you introduce them, there's this question that I use with adult professionals, and it's how would you describe your job to a five-year-old? And I just that is such a powerful question because you let go of titles and the big words, and you get to the heart of what you're doing and why you're doing it. So I'm gonna leave it up to you to introduce them because I I believe you met them before I did.
SPEAKER_04:I we met them at the same time, but I, you know, I do deep dives on people, and I really pay attention to what they're saying and what they're not saying. And so that's really key for me. So today we're gonna have two individuals, uh, and I'm gonna stop calling them individuals. I'm just calling them who they are. This is Tamara and Dania. And again, two awesome people who have um a long history, 30 years in one, 26 or 28 in another one with uh early childhood development and uh degreed up the wazoo. Just just just know there's some doctorates, there's some masters, there's a couple of masters, I believe.
SPEAKER_01:There's a whole lot of letters flying in this video. MD, LD, P D.
SPEAKER_04:That's right, and then T D. And we'll get into that a little bit later. So, guys, welcome on in the video. Welcome.
SPEAKER_00:It's awesome to be here.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, yeah. Tell us, tell us about yourself, first of all. We'll start with Tamara, and you just tell us what you want us to know, getting to know you. That way we can have an idea of who we who we're talking to.
SPEAKER_02:What a broad question to ask. Absolutely about you. Whoa. That's so broad about me. Um, can we start with like the one question? The one, what was I like as a child?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, let's do that. Let's do that. Let's do warm-up, shall we? Let's warm this up with the word that best describes you as a kid.
SPEAKER_02:Um, I think if you ask my mom, she would say busy. Busy. Um, I I joke that my mom, when I was young, she wanted to have me tested because she thought I was I had ADD or something because I would never stop. Um my sister stopped her because I was just two, three. I was just I was just young and she was a little bit older. But I think that I I've I've constantly just been busy. And I think still to this day, I'm busy. I continue to stay busy. And then and my busy is with early childhood education.
SPEAKER_04:That's what I'm talking about. Tell us a little bit about the childhood uh early childhood education.
SPEAKER_02:So for me, I you know, I w I you asked that question. What how would a how would a I would describe my job to a five-year-old? Yeah. Um, my nephews, when I was we were in the car driving one day, and they said, you know, what do you do? And I, you know, I described, well, I what do I do? You know, at the time I was a director of a preschool, and I said, Well, I go into classrooms and I work with the teachers, and I get to play in the classroom, and I sit and do play-doh, and I help a teacher write a lesson plan, and I and then I go to my night job and and I do this, and and they were like, So you teach teachers?
SPEAKER_01:There you go.
SPEAKER_02:And I said, Exactly. Yeah, I teach teachers, and and that was the end.
SPEAKER_04:Nice.
SPEAKER_02:So I teach I teach teachers.
SPEAKER_04:She teaches, teaches part-time, and then she's an adult five-year-old at times.
SPEAKER_02:Right. Basically, I think can I am adult five-year-old even when I'm teaching teachers? Nice. You ask them. Yeah, I think that would I think that would that would sum it up.
SPEAKER_01:I would they look at me sometimes like I think that's one of the best ways to teach adults actually is playfulness and fun and bringing them back and bringing back childhood activities. I think it works the best because you're out of your head and you're in an area of play where creativity and imagination just runs rampant.
SPEAKER_02:The disequilibrium. That's where we learn best. And if we can get everybody just to relax and let it go and just say, Hey, relax. I just want to learn new things.
SPEAKER_04:I'm gonna double back for uh Dania with that question. I'm gonna jump to the next one and then we'll double back. Okay. Uh, what did you always dream of becoming?
SPEAKER_00:Um, since I was um five, it was a teacher. Nice. I've never not wanted to be a teacher. I think when I was three, one of the little artworks that my mom had said nurse. I don't know why. We were probably doing community helpers at that point. I don't know. But from kindergarten on, teacher, never anything else. Never anything else. Never. Did you ever play teacher going up? Yeah. Isn't that fun? Oh god, I was everybody's teacher, and you sit down right here and you do this and you do that. I mean, little cousins and people stop playing with me because I'm always making them take classes.
SPEAKER_01:My my cousins stop playing we too. They're like, are we really doing a full day of school? Yes, we're all from school today.
SPEAKER_00:Exactly. No, I I had a coordinated recess time. I don't know why anybody was complaining, but you know, there was a schedule. There was always a schedule when it comes to me.
SPEAKER_04:So we'll go ahead and answer that first question for you now, Daniel. Um, what word describes you uh who you were as a kid? Bossy. Bossy, busy and bossy.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, busy and bossy, and that is changed. I have not changed. My mom will tell you the same thing. Anyone who knows me from back in the day to now will tell you the same. Yeah, we're yeah, we're the same. But I was bossy, and um, I think a a child went up to my mom at some point at in the after school program. She came to pick me up, and um, he came up to her. I oh no, it was preschool and said, Uh, your daughter is bossy. And my mom was like, uh, I'm sorry. Because what could she say? She knew, she knew. Don't be bossy, baby. No, she wasn't gonna say that because she always did want me to have the upper hand. So bossy, bossy remained, remained at all times.
SPEAKER_01:So, how would you describe your job to a five-year-old then?
SPEAKER_00:Um, at this point, um, as I speak to my son, and he wants to know what did you do today and how did you do it, and now that sounds like too much work, mom, and don't do that no more. Um, I tell him now, I'm just the boss of the teachers, and I get to help them. And that seems to satisfy that question. No, just the boss of the teachers.
SPEAKER_01:I love that. How I would describe my job to a five-year-old might be I help bosses be nice people.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, I like that one. I like that one.
SPEAKER_01:So important. Okay. So I hear teacher, what did you want to become? Um, Tamara.
SPEAKER_02:I had no, I didn't, you know, when I was thinking about it, I I don't really have I I'm more of a moment-to-moment person. Yeah. So when I was younger, I was an athlete. So my whole focus was in the moment. I was an athlete in the moment. So it kind of comes to me as it comes. So I I was I played sports. So I played sports, and then I became a teacher. And that's that's where I go. I go where it takes me.
SPEAKER_04:What sports were you involved in?
SPEAKER_02:Oh, soccer, volleyball, track and field, um, basketball. Serious athlete. Uh yeah. I went to I I had a scholarship on in track and field leaving out of high school.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. So that's something that you and Corey have in common. Uh, I played um softball and volleyball. I was captain of the Pep Club. Um, and all four years of playing. Right. All four years of playing, I was most inspirational. Yes, but we need the I was that person. We need the inspirational people. Okay, so speaking of inspiration, I'm wondering what experiences shaped your passion for early education, for teaching young learners, opposed to the older ones, because there's a huge difference in that.
SPEAKER_00:Huge difference, huge difference. I know when I first said I wanted to be a teacher, it was modeled after two teachers that I had that changed the world for me. And it wasn't that they did anything in particular other than they knew me. And and and you could tell that they knew me and they poured into me because they knew me. Um, I went to a very small um Christian school as as growing up. And so, you know, there wasn't a whole lot of, you know, not a lot of outside influence all the time and stuff like that. But that was also back in the day when my teacher could call my mom and be like, yeah, Daniel's, you know, go in the house with me and you know, you can pick her up later, you know, and it no second thought. Yeah, no second thought about it. And so I wanted to be my fourth grade teacher when I I I wanted to be my kindergarten teacher because she was just cool. Okay. But I wanted to be my fourth grade teacher because she was she was all there. She did everything and she did stuff outside of work that was really cool, and you know, that's who I wanted to be. And then one day I did, um I was assigned the fourth grade Sunday school class. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. After that, it was like we're gonna take this down a bunch. And I loved being in the nursery. And so then that that age group that finished attracting me right there, and it's always been that ever since. And and being their sense of wonder, being the first one to catch the aha moment and being their first introduction to how wonderful school can be. That's what I want it to be.
SPEAKER_01:It's powerful. I'm curious. Your fourth grade teacher, were you able to keep in touch with her?
SPEAKER_00:And some, yeah, okay. Some um, my mom just saying said that she posted something on Facebook and the teacher saw it and was like, I always knew. Oh, so that's special. Yeah, it's really sweet.
SPEAKER_01:That's cool. So, Damera, we're gonna have you answer this same question after you're done. If you could just lead us into how you two have come together and what you two together are about. Because we're talking to a team of women, it wasn't just happen chance, like, oh, we have you, and then we have you, but this is a team um effort going on.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. So um, I'm actually opposite of Daniel. I think my my poll to the to the field is through um the opposite of the the teachers that that weren't there. So I see um I didn't have good experiences with teachers. I didn't I don't have that teacher to look back on. I mean there was there was a couple, um, but mostly just the children that are left behind. I don't want I want the children to be seen and heard and all of them say more, please. So it was it was the the moments where you know that um there's things going on and you the trauma. You know, there's children with trauma, um children that need to be heard and seen. That's that's the biggest thing. I don't even know. I guess I'm feeling a little emotional right now. Yeah, you're where that comes from.
SPEAKER_00:Um I don't know where that came from. I'm looking for it. I'm over here willing her lip to not quiver. Don't do it.
SPEAKER_02:Don't do it, don't do it. Um, no, I think um so in thinking about that, you know. Um my dissertation is all about I I was, you know, I've been going all around this. Um there is they there's a lot of that talk about you come to the field to make a difference, you know, why what's your what is your why? What is your why? And then I was I I talk about what's your what? What is your what? Um so I want to encourage people, uh the people that I'm teaching, the teachers that I'm teaching, we need to see everyone. There's there's students, there's children. I came to the field because we need to make a difference. And that that's so cliche. That's so cliche. Um but we come in and I don't want any students to be facing the wall when everyone else is looking the other direction. So nobody in timeout, yeah, nobody excluded.
SPEAKER_04:Right. I I gotta jump in there because Jen, I've shared this with you uh a little bit, but you guys don't know this about me. I was the kid left behind. I was the kid that was ostracized or in the other room while everybody was doing and I didn't understand why. And of course, I'm not gonna say I was the angel in the situation, but I was just a very hyper high energy, high-level producing type of kid. And so if you have kids that are not as active and as as hyper as I was, then I'm the distraction. And um, so that speaks volumes to me. I I look back now and I and I say to myself, why didn't this teacher just say, hey, go outside and run around the football field a couple of times and come back in? So I could just get some of that out.
SPEAKER_00:See, and my question would be, why didn't that teacher step up and give you what you needed? That's where I would be at in that situation. That and that's what we are teaching teachers to do is these children are not to be excluded, but to be even more included than you would ever imagine because that's what they're looking for.
SPEAKER_03:Right.
SPEAKER_00:They're looking for you to include them. How are you gonna step up your game to include them?
SPEAKER_02:That child. So you are the reason you are the child that Dane and I teach to. Right, right.
SPEAKER_04:And I think that's I'm starting to see the underlying connection and what you're doing and how you express that. So yeah, that's good stuff.
SPEAKER_02:Which leads us into how Dane and I are, I mean, Dani and I came together through through our jobs. We met through our jobs early on. We met early on in our job in just connecting. Um not really connecting, but we were, hey, how you doing? Like, and then later I'm good, thank you. You're good, thank you. Um, and later when we were actually had the opportunity to work closely together, um, just uh two and a half years ago, we we connected uh through our job, and um through that we started realizing that we are on the same page, who we are basically the same person, um, with a lot of the same ideas, working towards the same goals, and we need to really harness that harness that and grow it. Um, and we have something. So that's where we started. And and only one year ago did we really start to do that.
SPEAKER_04:Nice.
SPEAKER_02:Can you tell us the name of the company that you've so we we have created uh T D training and development, early childhood training and development. So T D training and development and Tamara and Dania. Uh T and D right there.
SPEAKER_00:And then our government name, because you have to have one of those. Yeah, our government name is T D uh Growth Unboxed. Growth Unboxed.
SPEAKER_02:You know, because you have to have that that LLC name. You know, and yeah, you want to hear a funny story of how we we determine that name.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, we'd like to hear.
SPEAKER_02:We like funny stories because you know we're we're very playful. So um in our classes, we always do you know, those wheels where you put everybody's name on there to see who gets to win. Well, the way that we chose our LLC name, we couldn't decide what we wanted it to be. So instead of the wheel, there's there's another app where you can do a duck race.
SPEAKER_00:So we put all of our ideas onto this duck race. And it was only ideas that no matter what won, we were gonna be okay with.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, yes. How many ducks were there? Six.
SPEAKER_00:Um, no, there was a lot more than six.
SPEAKER_01:I think that we narrowed it. Okay, maybe seven.
SPEAKER_00:No, there was a lot more than six. You said maybe seven. No, it was double-digit duck news.
SPEAKER_02:We had all the ducks race, um, and they're like um, and then so the duck that won, we we didn't even argue, it became that name. So that's how we determined our growth scene. Unbox on box growth on box growth on boxes, our LLC. Got it, man.
SPEAKER_00:So that's and everything starts with T D. Everything, yeah no matter what. Touchdown. It is a touchdown.
SPEAKER_02:It is, it is winning. I like it.
SPEAKER_01:You know, one of the reasons why we're so excited to have you here is we have a passion for children as well. And our our if we had to put in one sentence, I think it would be just where kids can be kids again, especially in the world of today. We've we've robbed them of childhood, the ability to play and to explore. We've kind of shut them down or their voices and filled it with other voices that they find on the internet, TikTok, whatever that is. Um, and we have a lot of listeners who are young parents and um young kiddos. A lot of the feedback we get is actually from them, and they have kids who are listening to this podcast. So I want to ask T D Growth Unboxed, um, what what words of wisdom, what love letter do you want to give to the parents and to the kids um with a focus on um teaching your kids at a young age?
SPEAKER_00:You want me to go? I can start. Um number one, we always the love, the first love letter is to that parent to tell them you're okay. You're okay. You're doing this and you're gonna do keep doing this. Don't give up doing this for your baby. Whatever it is that you're trying to do for your baby, keep going. No, you know, and it it there are nights when it's hard, and there's times when you're tired. Keep going. Okay. Um give them what you can and then seek out those who can give them the rest. Yes, because you it's it is not a one-man job. Sure. There's nowhere near a one-man job. So we start with um uplifting that parent, and then my my tea over here comes running in to play with that kid.
SPEAKER_02:That's what it is, and play. Remember the play, remember your own play. Remember to be just a kid. Yeah. I think that's what they they want that. They want to be acknowledged when they say your name, like answer. You know, that's what they they they want you to be there. And it's and it's put down the phone. Put down the phone for a conversation. When they do a bid for bid for conversation, answer it. And and take some time. We we um have put in taco Fridays, fish taco Fridays that include a game. Um, we're working on executive function skills because we all need a little help with our executive function skills, just you know, taking being able to sit and sit and attend for you know on something besides our phones. I mean, I'm guilty. I will look at my phone, I will scroll TikTok because I love it and I shouldn't. Um, but I do. And so um just being able to sit and attend to a game for a little while and and pay attention to the people around us for a little and just have a conversation and just have a fish taco. And have a fish taco.
SPEAKER_03:Right.
SPEAKER_00:Because fish tacos are the best. Oh my god. Well, I have a we have a specific place that we go that it's like standing on the top of La Bufadora in Ensenada. Yeah, every bite, and you're like, I can hear the ocean, I can hear the windows.
SPEAKER_04:Say more, I need to know where this place is.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, we'll we'll talk after. It's a beautiful place.
SPEAKER_04:So, who wants to tell how you met briefly and what made how does it make sense for you guys to collaborate?
SPEAKER_00:We met again. Um, we were both um adjunct professors, and then we both came together um as teachers on special assignment in a local school district, and um we connected. It just by day three, it was like, this is it, this is going down. This here is my other person. This is this this she gets me, and I don't even know why yet, but okay, let's do this. And when we start bouncing ideas off of each other and stuff like that, it was it was incredible. So we harnessed that energy in that particular job and began to presenting to teachers and making those connections and relationships with those teachers and drew them in. They just sucked it up and and we just kept going. And we don't do anything simple, we don't have good enough sense enough to do anything simple and not go hard, right? No matter what. So I love it. We I mean, and so we took that and decided we're gonna take this on the road.
SPEAKER_02:And and we were yeah, because we were PDs were like, hmm, do you want to present at a conference? So we did our first conference in November of 2024.
SPEAKER_00:Um was it 2023, 2023, 2024?
SPEAKER_02:But we're like, hmm, this is kind of fun.
SPEAKER_00:You want to do more? It was so funny because it wasn't her conference, she didn't like that particular genre of the learning domain. And then you said it out loud. You said math. Okay.
SPEAKER_02:I'm getting used, I'm I'm I'm liking it more now.
SPEAKER_00:I'm bringing it to where I like it. But we did a we did that one, and it was a small one. Hey, let's do another one. Okay, let's do another one, and things just grew, and so that connection stayed.
SPEAKER_02:It was on my bucket list. Presenting at conferences was was always on my bucket list, but it wasn't something that I was willing to really go out and do. Like I didn't know where to start.
SPEAKER_00:And I was already signed up for that conference, and the person I was gonna present with was no longer there. Here comes Tamara, she's here now. Oh, let's do this. Yeah, so that's what we did.
SPEAKER_02:Our connection was just there, it just made sense. Yeah. And when we started doing it, and it was like, what?
unknown:Hmm.
SPEAKER_00:If it works, it worked. It does. It was only a few months before we really were finishing each other's sentences, and and and I knew her thoughts. And you could do that whole girl thing across the room, and you can read the I, and you're like, mm-hmm. And that and that was it.
SPEAKER_02:You say finish each other's sentences. I want to that song finish each other's sandwiches. Every time you say that, I just want to say sandwiches. Okay. Feel free. All right.
SPEAKER_01:All right. So one of the questions that we always bring up always has to do with a story. Um, story adds connection, it gives meaning to the work that you do. What's a story that you have that has just stayed with you as you're working with young kiddos?
SPEAKER_02:I think for me, the story that always stays with me um is a story of a child who um was really struggling in the in the class. She was struggling so much with making friends, with connecting with other other children. Um, she was getting in she just was behaviors, um, always having a call mom because she was struggling and everybody was getting upset with her. Um, and later it turned out that she was having uh vision problems. She needed glasses. And and this whole vision thing was it was throwing her off. She couldn't, it was angles. So she was always looking. She couldn't tell if the thing and this whole this one sensory problem was causing all of these other issues for her. But nobody knew it. We were going through all of the I was working with the mom and we were working really closely and doing everything that we can to get her all the assessments and everything. And it was I was working at a private preschool, so we didn't have access to a lot of things besides going other places. Um, and but she, you know, had a lot of incidences, and and I remember she told me once, this little girl told me, I hate you more than I hate my dad, and I hate him a lot. And that's always stuck with me. And I was like, whoa, you're four. Um, but and and you know, and fast forward, and then just remember thinking, we're gonna do everything that we can for her, and you're gonna make it through this class, and you're gonna and and the parents were on board, but the parents were, you know, they were rough, and one of the dad, the dad had a his a disability, and the mom was a nurse and she was working nights, so there was a lot of things going on in this family, but we worked diligently with her and um and you know, fast forward to her being now in in in high school, ninth grader, and and she's suc she's very successful, she's in drama, um, she's just doing well. So just thinking about what you do early with the children, and that goes back to my I'm not gonna leave anyone behind. My why. My I'm going to if you need who needs me the most, I'm gonna I'm gonna pay attention to every single child. I'm gonna individualize for every child, but I'm especially going to make sure that the ones that need me the most are gonna get as much as me as they can. So that's where that's why those are the stories, and I and there's a few. There's quite a few. And you know, I've been hit and kicked and punched, and that's some of the best parts.
SPEAKER_04:I remember that. Gene, I gotta say this real quick, and I'm sorry I've jumped in there real quick, but um it it's these moments of inspiration that just reminds you why this system can be so great, and and how we can have something successful for the younger generation. You know, I'm thinking in my mind, when did this start? This had to have happened some time ago, but that that's not what was happening in my day and in my age. So I I just feel like, man, how much further along could so many people be if we had a Miss Tamara and a Miss Daniel in in in their lives and able to support and jump in there and recognize the situations that were really going on. And I'm sure you guys are probably wishing you had more time, but I'm I'm gonna go off the script just a little bit. Just give me some information on how this is continuing to drive you and knowing what you know because you get to see both sides.
SPEAKER_02:How this drives us, how it keeps us moving and going. I we show up for work every day. We give it, I mean, we give it all we give everything that we can. I I'm still, you know, behind the scenes. We go to meetings with the county, we we go to these conferences, we talk to people. Um, I don't want to take from Dania.
SPEAKER_00:Dania gets to share her her story. I was I was just upset that you shared that one instead of one one of my favorites, which was the I'm gonna. Know you one? Oh that creeped you out.
SPEAKER_02:A little girl that creeped me out and said, I'm gonna know everything about you.
SPEAKER_00:She just stood in her face. I'm gonna know everything about you. We can't share all the stories right now. I want you to share your story. Oh gosh. Um you made me forget it. Put me on the spot like that.
SPEAKER_01:Well, while you're thinking about that, I'm wondering if the ninth grader still hates you more than she does her dad.
SPEAKER_02:You know, after you know, I used I I stayed friends with the mom and and I used to go and I haven't seen them in a while. Um, but I would afterwards, you know, they they never they never hold that. Yeah. In that moment she did. In the moment when she had to be with me because, you know, she had stabbed somebody with a uh at the end of a flower, um, a fake flower. Um, she had to be with me, and she did not like that. But you know, the next day when she came, she gave me a hug, and I gave her a hug, and I said, I'm so glad to see you today. I'm glad you're at school.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Because I was, because I wanted to see her every day. Um, and that's and she was happy to see me too. Yeah. Because in the moment she was mad.
SPEAKER_01:I'm gonna say that uh it was such a good thing for her to have that stabbing moment with the flower because she was able to then to work with you and have you in her life. Because I'll just say this from my perspective. As a child who grew up in a Filipino home in the Asian culture, we're we weren't allowed to express our emotions. So I'm wondering, as you're talking about being left behind, the kids who don't act out and it's all internal, there is a form of getting left behind because we're pretending everything's okay or we're living up to the standards of what everyone else has set forth and have totally denied the emotions we're feeling. Right. Right. So that that's an interesting perspective when kids don't act out. What it's how is the system ensuring that children still aren't left behind? Does that make sense?
SPEAKER_02:No, yeah, for sure. I think I've I think I've texted you something about that before. Um could we link the children that aren't, you know, expressing those emotions early? Can we link that later to anxiety? We're we're not able to express it and we're holding it in. Can you know, and later depression and depression, yeah. You know, because we're not we don't know how to name those things. We played a game at at at the network where you were our whole presentation at the network was about humor and social emotional development. And we talked to to the to everyone about uh we had played a game where you had to name the emotion that the other person was acting out, and when the person came up and they looked at the card and they were like, I don't know how to act that out. We know what it feels like in the moment when you're feeling it, you know what it feels like. But how do I act that if I'm not feeling it? You don't know. So how do we so we've never learned how to really express what we're feeling if we're not actually feeling it?
SPEAKER_00:Actually, it piggybacks off of what both of you guys have said. Um, we grew up and and it was, you know, you feel how I tell you to feel, and that's pretty much it. You are a child, you don't know what your feelings are. Right. And yes, actually, I do know what my feelings are, I'm just not allowed to say it. Had we had any of those things that Tamara worked with, that I have worked with, it was your teacher told your mom, you went home, got in trouble, and you never had that problem again. And that was it. It was like when someone gets diagnosed with ADHD or someone gets diagnosed with autism. We in in the culture, you go home, you get punished, you know, you get that on the bottom, and then you never had autism again. Not at school. This is true, you know, you never did, you just didn't do that anymore because you you're not gonna act like that at school, put my name on the line as your mother, and you know, all that kind of stuff. So it was like, how many things could those kiddos have needed that we didn't get because we weren't allowed to show what was really going on and what did it do to their body, their mind, as they tried to process this stuff and had to hold it back. Right. And and what was really, really going on with that, you know? It's it was it's a it's a real deep dive conversation because we go into the cultural thing and we go into you know the timing and the era that you're in, and the you know, and then there was when everybody had ADHD. We all got rid of it, right? You know, and it's like, no, they were four, they were not ADD, you know, they didn't have ADD, you know, they had some energy, you know, and that was all there was to it.
SPEAKER_04:So yeah, I I oh, you just touched a real soft spot for me because um, as I told you, I worked in the non-public school system, and uh, we kept those um individuals till 22, and so a lot of them were medicated. And I remember thinking to myself as these kids are lined up to get meds on a daily basis, how many of these kids have been misdiagnosed? How many of these kids are um on something that's actually hurting them opposed to helping them? And so um it it makes you think and it pushes you to ask questions. And if you don't know who to ask, right, you find yourself just randomly asking questions. Who can help you? Can you give us a little information on who can help you?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. Well, you would hope it's your teachers first. I mean, um that's where you that's where you're gonna go. The the the teachers are gonna be your first um that's the first defense, line of defense. Um but you have the the the system of education that is supposed to help you with those things. And I think that we're still not, we're still not. We're still not really, I think there's still a disconnect in in recognizing um and then there's some there's some disconnect there in trauma and ADD and autism symptoms that are all kind of overlapping.
SPEAKER_04:Right.
SPEAKER_02:So, you know, I teach a I teach childhood stress and trauma, and we say, look, these symptoms look a lot like these symptoms. So we are trying to teach teachers to recognize what does this look like? How do we connect with these children? And it's about building relationships first, right? Yeah. So if we can start to build the relationships with students and say, okay, this is what I'm seeing, and then building relationships with the families so that we can encourage them to start to reach out, whether it's with the district or with other services, because there's a lot of services, you know, in the counties that we live in, um, that could help.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And and getting over the stigma of where those services may come from because I may tell you about this service. You hear it comes from the special ed department, and parents shut down right then and there. You will not label my child special ed. You will not do the special services. It's like no label. No, no, this service is, I mean, it's funded through this department. That's it. You know, it doesn't give your child this label, but there are some who can't even get past the title of the department that it comes from. And so that kid still misses out. The mom did the right thing, the parents did the right thing reaching out, and then we hit this wall. So there's lots of barriers that can be there that if you have those relationships with families, you can get them past some of that stuff and really get those kiddos what they need when they need it and not years later.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. I have a story actually of a teacher, and I just think one of her superpowers was the ability to triage, if you will. Remember, my world's nursing. Right. So I wonder how are teachers triaging and being able to give first aid? And then if it requires something of a more intense intervention, do they know where to go? So my son had issues early on in school and he had a speech impediment. And we had a school psychologist that lived right across the street from me, and she used to babysit, well, not babysit, but she would tutor my other my other child. And she said, Jen, the school district is gonna try to do the quick labeling of ADHD on him. And that's not what it is. He's it's something with his speech. I get him checked maybe for hearing, look and see what physiologically could be happening. It does not it doesn't have to jump to the other stuff. So sure enough, he had a hearing deficit big time in his left ear. So got that fixed. He was pulled into special classes for speech in special ed. And it was so funny. We go grocery shopping because he's learning how to enunciate, right? He's all mom, and I said, Yes. He says, Can I get some cheetos? I was like, I want some cheetos. Okay. So what it ended up doing was teaching him to have a British accent. I love it. I love it. But yeah, I'm just so grateful that my neighbor was able to step in, give me that advice because as a parent, you're like, what's wrong with my child? And it's just it's disheartening when your kids coming back, not learning, kids are making fun of them, and it's this whole thing. And it can be something that as a parent you take personally. Oh, yeah. Right. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:No, you're either underwhelmed or overwhelmed.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So I'm just grateful for when the system does work because I think it's designed to and it understands that there's flaws and there's gaps. But with people like you who are passionate about bridging those gaps and bringing the resources and giving the education and the support, that warms my heart because it's so needed in the world that we live in, where we're just so quick to diagnose, so quick to prescribe. And I'm gonna end this and I'm gonna hand it over. Is um, I think there's power in the way we name things too. So, for example, as a nurse, when you come to end-of-life stuff, there's a DNR, which means do not resuscitate. That messes with your mind. Like you both have love for each other, and at no time, I don't think, would we naturally say, I don't want you to bring her back to life. Right?
SPEAKER_00:I would be all over you.
SPEAKER_01:Right. But like, no, no, keep trying. Yeah, the thing now they're looking at changing it to another title, A and D, um, a natural death, understanding that death is a part of life and this is happening naturally. Right. So the naming convention is so important. So special ed, yes, parents are like, oh no, not my child, or I don't like, you know, we even let's be intentional about the way we name things.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, I think they have changed, like in re you know, they have special services, you know. So we are changing the wording a lot of the time now. So I think that is something, and I think too, there are a lot of there are still a lot of people that are working for the children. Yeah, so I think that that that we are we have them out there. Yes. There are fighters. There are they're I'm quite hopeful out there. So I think it is good.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, I I'm for sure it's uh some good fighters, good workers out there. As a matter of fact, I I had a superhero uh for a fourth grade teacher, Mr. Geiger.
SPEAKER_02:Nice, right? Jim Geiger. I love it, and Mr. Geiger.
SPEAKER_04:He was a military man, so uh my last name is Body, and that's all he called me. He never called me by my first name. Nice. Body, you are not meeting the mark today. And I was just like, oh man, I like this like hardcore drill sergeant type. That's what you needed, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:And then where are you gonna meet them where they are?
SPEAKER_04:They were there then too. It's just, you know, sometimes you just have that moment where you can't find them and you need them. It's like that police thing, you know. Where's the police when you're when you're really they're never here when you need them, right? Exactly. But you know, um, I'm gonna ask this last place. I think we should do a part two, Jen. What do you say?
SPEAKER_01:I I welcome it and would love it. I'm looking at them like Yes, okay.
SPEAKER_00:Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01:Any reason to have them over again? Okay, that works.
SPEAKER_04:Absolutely. So, why does the the the work still impact you so emotionally?
SPEAKER_00:Well, you you had more tears in your eyes than I. Yes, I put that out there. Really? Yes, I did.
SPEAKER_04:I was right there with her though.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yes. Yeah, so was I. Yeah, you guys. There's some cries here.
SPEAKER_02:Just so emotional. Um, I think because it's it's what I do, it's what I love. Yes that I continue to show up for. Um, it drives me. You know, you always want to do you I think it's one of those things. If you don't love what you do, don't do it.
SPEAKER_04:Don't do it.
SPEAKER_02:And and you need to know when you're done. I keep telling teachers that, and I think that's one of the things that teachers have a tendency not to not to stop when you're done. When you just when you're done. And I'm not done.
SPEAKER_00:And then not even not even close. That's part of it. Are we ever? You know, no matter what the ability level is in your heart, if that's what your passion is, you're never done. You're never done. How how you um how you manipulate that and come and complete that differently may be different, but we're never really done. And it's what Tamra said, it's what it drives us because we know what it can look like when it's successful. And so we're gonna keep going until everybody can experience that success. Because once you get a taste of that success, it's a wrap. You're gonna do it until the day is done.
SPEAKER_02:Just, you know, when when you walk into or when you're walking, even no matter where you're going, if you're just walking into a classroom or if you're walking by a playground and the children see you and and they say, Hi, Miss Tamra. And you know, and they're like happy to see you and they want to hug you or just say hi. It makes it everything that you do worth it. Yeah, everything that's all you need. Yeah, nothing else, just that makes it all worth it.
SPEAKER_00:For sure.
SPEAKER_01:I'm gonna agree. We um had one of our friends, we call them forest friends, a little girl, and we saw her yesterday at an event. And this sounds big-headed of me, but I am saying exactly what you're saying. But in an in other words, and she says, Hi, and she hugs you and takes you in because there's that connection, right? There's the relationship that you're talking about, and she says, You look so fabulous. Oh, and it was just so so sweet, you know, and just so uplifting. And just to be in that kind of relationship with kids where they're flourishing, where it's more than survival and they're getting to thrive, and you get to see their relationship with her mom is just so beautiful, and you could see healthy parenting happening. And so I I get it. And I I just want to say that my heart is full of hope for the kids today because of people like you. Um, and I I just love how with your stories, um you've experienced some of this and you're bringing that into your work, into your service. And um, I just I just we really encourage that. And I'm excited for part two because there's so much more here, and we don't want to rush this through. I mean, you all are um podcasting, working on a book, like you said, you just don't stop. You busy, you you busy. We're real busy, and you're bossy, real bossy.
SPEAKER_04:Absolutely. I love all of this, and again, I can't wait to to get back into this real soon here. Uh, Tamara and Dania did something so fabulous for Jen and I. They brought us a gift, and we're gonna open that gift right here.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, not in part right now.
SPEAKER_04:No, no, we're gonna get together right now.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, and I'm kind of um well, we can talk about the title of your podcast and not okay. So it's talk early to me. Talk early to me, girl. Okay, so talk early to me. So when I saw the gift, I was like, oh, I wonder if I'm I should open this here, but we're going to unseat. Yay!
SPEAKER_00:So everything has a story that's in that bag.
SPEAKER_01:Taco cat spelled backwards. This is taco cat.
SPEAKER_02:Taco cat spelled backwards.
SPEAKER_01:A little board game with a cat who's also a taco. Okay. And look at I'm looking for the camera so I can show it, but I'm just said to show pictures.
SPEAKER_00:Oh that's from our that's from game night. So now you guys have something for fish taco game night.
SPEAKER_01:Nice. And this is a notebook journal. Journal. And the lady is well, no, that's a statue. Is that supposed to be Michelangelo? Who is this? What is this? For fun.
SPEAKER_02:Maybe she should have read the card first. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, you want me to read the card and understand what it is? Let me read the card first. Okay, we can go into the card if you want. So it's addressed to take the elevator.
SPEAKER_04:That's us.
SPEAKER_01:Yes. And it says thank you. Take the elevator. Corey and Jen, thank you so much for the chance to collaborate. Please accept these tokens that represent Dania, right? And Tamara. Talk early to me. Enjoy Tamara and Dania.
SPEAKER_04:Now, while she's opening the rest of the gift, I gotta I gotta say this because this is a first in our history. We've been on the air for uh since 2021, and we've never received a gift from anyone. So this is this means a lot.
SPEAKER_00:You know what? Tamara's uh been trained well, and she talks about never going anywhere empty-handed, and then my mom and her gift giving is there's always something for somebody no matter what.
SPEAKER_02:And so since you were getting to know us, I mean, getting on the elevator, we're getting to know each other. So these are just things that kind of represented us in a way and who we are. So the get the game is kind of a game night thing, and we're we're Dania is a Dania's all about a journal and a pen.
SPEAKER_00:So my I am all and I don't necessarily journal all the time, but I have to write about 1300 lists for everything.
SPEAKER_02:Notes of the things, and the bubble gum is kind of a homage to the bubble uh or a balloon. Um, because we have balloon, I'm the balloon, and she's the string.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, we're gonna post some we're gonna post some pictures of these gifts.
SPEAKER_01:And reels of me using it.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, Danis snacks. This is my newest snack obsession.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, there you go. Oh, we even get the Amazon. I don't know why they're so delicious, but they are. She's in the Skittles, and and then I'm always been Arisa's peanut butter cup. Wait a minute, that's me. Oh, that is me. I will fight you in the street for Arisa's peanut butter cup, okay?
SPEAKER_02:And then uh colored paper mate, yes. Are you speaking? Her love language now. Everybody needs a good fidget. And these these are um kind of obsession right now. Oh goodness, they're buns. Is there a bun? So one for each of you to have a fidget. Oh um, you see how light fidgety things. See, and so actually, everybody's on the look for a special one, I think, that's supposed to be glittery. So I don't know, it's you it's also a surprise if you get the special the special glitter one fidget one.
SPEAKER_00:But yeah, Tamara has fidgets on her desk, and and she's decorating my desk with fidgets too.
SPEAKER_02:Not that a few of our favorite things. Absolutely. When the dog bites, when the beasts. Oh, yeah. There you go. Yeah, so just to share a little bit.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, thank you so much for thank you so much for you elevators. Yeah, come on. Don't come to my house empty-handed. I'm playing. You come any way you want to.
SPEAKER_01:Well, when we bring you back, there's so much more we want to unpack. Um, I just want to thank you for opening your heart. Yeah, absolutely. And just sharing with us and being who you are and just the work that you do. I hope this is the beginning to a long relationship between Corey and I and you two and whatever we can do to support you. Like we're all about it. Just thank you for thank you for everything that you're doing.
SPEAKER_04:Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Are we good? Oh, wait, no. I I'm gonna elongate this a little bit because we're gonna end with something that we haven't done with other um elevators. We're gonna do ri rapid fire lightning round, and this is gonna be real quick. So we're gonna go around. Corey's gonna start with you, and we're gonna this way. Okay. So, and if you don't have an answer, just pass. Okay. No judgment. Favorite childhood book Green exam. Where the wild things are. Mine was that one, the frog and toad. Do you remember them? Yeah, the internet frog. Yeah. Okay. Most underrated skill kids need.
SPEAKER_04:Communication.
SPEAKER_00:Um sitting and attending. I'm I'm with according to the line. Communication, social emotional skills.
SPEAKER_01:Great. I'm gonna pass because so much is going on in my mind on this. Last question. One thing adults should stop saying to children.
SPEAKER_04:No. That's the worst word you can teach a child in in most instances. Let me explain just all the faces open. So so I hear a lot of kids saying no to the wrong people in the wrong time. And if you teach a kid to use other words, like I'm I don't want that right now, or please don't touch my toy right now, it removes that negative connotation of no to everything. So that's what I say.
SPEAKER_01:Is that gonna be our second episode? The word no.
SPEAKER_02:I don't you know, I don't know that there are words. I think that that every word is is is useful in in some way or another.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. Okay. Um, I don't think that we should be saying, you're fine. Stop telling, stop telling kids. You're fine. Because they might not be. They might not be. They might not be. They might not be.
SPEAKER_01:So Tamra's giving me something to think about. I was gonna say because I said so, but I think that's linked to my childhood, and there's some ties to that because it didn't give me a chance to explore anything. That was like the done deal. So um, I'm open to learn. I can't wait for the second episode.
SPEAKER_04:Mess me up, Jen, because this needs to have room to breathe now.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, we're gonna invite people to come back because it's gonna be a good, good episode. And you know, um, thanks for coming back. Thanks for inviting. I appreciate it. Well, you know us to take the elevator. We say, look up and let's elevate every day, elevate every day.
unknown:Calibate, every day, calibate.
